Butterflies

Where did the cute shyness and butterflies go?
Where is the 'even more romance' go?
The judgment fear... leading me to 'omfg, gotta clean the house before he comes over!' go?
The feeling of the first kiss with every kiss....
The fear of messing up....
The making me blush....

Dont you ever miss the 'before relationships' in middle school? Where you act like you hate each other but you guys are like so madly inlove with each other? And every little thing is such a big deal?
Even just looking at each other gives you butterflies... and you do things to accidentally bump into each other....

But then,... as soon as your dating,... you just take advantage of everything, and dont think much of anything...
after you start dating, holding hands is just holding hands,...
and a kiss is just a kiss.
You think about THEM before you go to bed,... but you dont think about kissing them, or holding their hand....
Not like you would in middle school, where you could think about the first kiss for hours and hours and hours, or think ABOUT kissing them for hours..... and its suuuch a big deal....

The first rose you keep forever... and every rose after that is just a waste.... even a bouquet of roses is a waste....
After your dating, its like the only thing you really appreciate is long walks

Sometimes the first fancy dinner after dating can be not so... romantic.
Its once you figure the person out... all that gives you butterflies now, is them telling you how hard you were to get with, and how nervous they were around you... back before you guys were dating.


You wonder why that is sometimes....
We need to stop fighting.... I need to stop fighting...
Im sorry