Why do girls have it so much harder than guys?
Guys could go into a low paying job dressed in what they dress everyday...
girls... cant.
but than again, girls have it a lot easier with different things.... sometimes.
Walking in that grass made me feel young again, and also made me miss my mom.... so I guess Im going to dedicate that song to her now
I wish my mom could have met Jared, as well as Ronnie [even if we didnt date] But I think my mom would have liked them... and I hope Jared would have liked my mom. Sometimes I think 'what is she thinking? What does she think of me now? I would have totally brought my mom to clubs.... and we could go shopping.... Whens the last time I actually went out to do nothing but buy clothes just because I was running low on new clothes? It must have been 2 years'
And than I think about how my mom wanted to go to the beach all the time, and I never took her before she died..... thats one of the worst regrets I have ever.... I have so many worse things... but think.... Someone who was born on an island... and loved the beach, loved the ocean... and all she wanted to do was sit in the sand, or feel the ocean breeze, or feel the water, and watch the sun set for the very last time in her life.... and all you could say is 'im busy' of course she wasnt in the hospic at the time... But still.... 
anyways.... Than today I was randomly thinking about a pick nick... I miss going camping and having a pick nick with the whole crew... yes, we were that cheesy... and we had it at this place called 'fox grove' it was gorgeous there.... a LOT of this video is taken in fox grove... like the place where the first sunset scene [or the only one] where its super pretty... yea...
anyways, I wish there was a country field looking place here in colorado.... Im such a sucker for pretty wheat looking fields, or just pretty places... I want pretty pictures of me and Jared lol
Today, omg, I was super happy to have slept 3 fricken hours with him.... it was the cutest thing ever... He snores loud though, but oh well.... <3 I wish there was a way I could get to know him a lot more.... Like I wish there were things I could tell him.... but it'd just be too strange for a conversation...
Facts:
I love pretty old vintage looking things
I like to pretend I can sing, but will never sing infront of someone.... well I will once in a blue moon
Pink is my favorite color, followed by light sea green
I LOVE when he kisses my forehead....
I love romance, and dont give a shit about sex
I wish all my friends were into photography... but 'friend' photography, or vintage looking type stuff
I love video taping
I wish I was prettier
I miss Turlock more than anything, well besides my mom and Juan and the whole crew
I LOVE watching the sunset.... or I should say I love walking around with friends or sitting at the park while the sun is setting... makes me content
I always dreamed about getting a van for my friends in turlock.... but now that we're all kinda moved.... thats out of the question. I always wanted to travel around with a bunch of friends, taking road trips..... im kinda crushed that Jared cant leave the denver area.... but I still think a van would be cool.... a Volkswagen :] and if we all stay friends, have rich ronnie chip andrew me jared all there... and yea... kayla =/ and klaa, but he might want to be the driver, and might kill us all haha...but that would be so much fun :]
I know every girl has their trust issues... but a lot of girls suddenly feel like they can trust someone new really fast.... but Jared.... idk.... it just seems like I REALLY CAN trust him.... I hope its true... he seems like a really great guy. And he is so respectful about everything... sometimes thats a little annoying, but oh well. I need to be less shy around him. 
I wish everyone dressed like this, and we rode bikes like this still 
I wish this is what my bedroom looked like! really really bad.... I miss being little lolSometimes I wish I could just run away to be with Jared.... like right now
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